What's the most valuable lesson you've learned in life, and how has it impacted your journey so far?
08.06.2025 00:50
Of all the layoffs, Torchy Todd and her gal pal, Tess Parker, were hit the hardest.
TEXT:
I hear you're a stunt-double now for Fred in Scooby-Doo.
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Only zombies dig to rock and roll, daddy-O!
¡Explotando Dick por todos lados!
Tess' boyfriend, Ed, now works as a Peter Lorre impersonator.
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Marijuana makes Jesus cry!
Make Nazis afraid again!
But Tess! I mean Betty! I mean Veronica! (I can never remember who is who) which ever one you are, I love you!
Before there was MAGA there was … the Comics Code Authority
Times might be tough … But at least there's one thing we all agree on.
Shameless vixen! Trollop!
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At least until the peyote kicks in ...
Speaking of which, poor Cleo Coco has ended up appearing in anti-vice pamphlets.
Sex! Lingerie! Knock knock jokes!
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Let's do what we always do, lay around half-naked while men make terrible jokes at our expense.
Every day is a good day to punch a Nazi! I mean MAGA! I mean the Comics Code Authority! (I can never remember who is who)
Yes, Tess, crime doesn't pay but apparently Rated-G horror does.
Why does a college girl cover her face with a scarf in Bangalore?
Perhaps now we can explore what being a “gal pal” really means.
Remember, kids, masturbation will make you see the devil everywhere!
Gadzooks! It's Torchy Todd slumming it in Yugoslavian science fiction! The shame!
What is the irony of life according to you?
Dick! I heard about the lay-off. What's a square-jaw crime fighter doing these days to bring in the bling?
Ironically, Wertham focused on stories about crime, singling out Batman and Robin for its gay subtext and Dick Tracy for its violence.
After you lather me up with that strawberry hand lotion.
Why am I not getting any atheists to debate with? Are they scared?
“Your boyfriend is a total perv, mommy.”
I've also been making ends meet ... By appearing in Tijuana splatter comics as Evil Gringo #2.
Just you, me, in a vat of lime jello, pulling hair, calling each other names …
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Torchy, we're unemployed … And no one is hiring scantily-clad wastrels these days.
Two letters of transit signed by General De Gaulle … Stimpy, you eediot!
Torchy thinks: Maybe I could play a gangster's moll since apparently smoking is still seen as wholesome and American.
How can I be okay with being ugly? What is the bright side?
In order to answer this I came up with a little story that goes like this …
And I ended up moonlighting in Japanese porn, but the less said about that the better.
In 1954 complete bastard and censorship campaigner Fredric Wertham published a book for the stated goal of creating a moral panic around comic book's alleged impact on juvenile delinquency. Much like the House Committee on Un-American Activities' disastrous impact on the film industry, the Comics Code Authority (obey, puny humans) put many hardworking comic book characters out of work all because of one poorly written book called …
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And then working as Betty and Veronica's body doubles ...